a humble reminder

contrary to our common views, i look at other's death as God' s reminder to us of how fragile our life can be sometimes. we have almost zero amount of control over it. the way i see it, life is like a lighted candle that has no idea whatsoever as to when a wind would come and just blow its light off and that's scary. God can choose to blow that light off anytime He wishes, after all it belongs to Him; He owns it.

however, if the end destination of our life is apparent, i don't see any reason why there should be fear. =)

business world madness

after yesterday's experience, i realised that the term "no money, no talk" really applies especially in the business world. a world of no emotions i call it. so unbelievable. sigh...heh

couldn't have done it without you

i have nothing much to say really except that it's kinda depressing that everything's back to normal after the somewhat long-awaited-chinese-new-year break has finally come to an end. lol

i'll try to post some pics of my CNY soon...next week maybe. i'll try. heh

dont expect too much, my dear

today's presentation didn't go really well. haha. well...i didn't even know that i was nervous until i realised i didn't know what i was talking about. i was babbling. for the first time i wasn't confident with what i was going to present. all thanks to the lecturer who expects to much out and ended up being dissapointed because the class only had like two weeks to prepare the report and the presentation, and she expects excellent outcomes.
she's dissapointed, its ok. but she made things worse by taking it out on us. every group seem to have flaws in their work. her remarks were generally not so pleasant i would say. heh. and mind you, we still have two more presentations to go! how to survive la?

my advice to her: chill...life's too short to be so stressed up. have a break, have a Kit Kat...LOL =p

the rain that falls in the night

there are some people who are placed in our lifes simply to bring misery. sometimes even the sight of them hurts you.

no i'm serious. i bet everyone has had or will have at least one person in his or her life that has painted or will paint unpleasant memories in his or her life. be it that 'best friend' you've known since forever that backstabs you for some guy or that boss who takes all the credit for the work you've done or that group of click in school who makes you feel like an outcast or that mum who favours your genius sister over you or that guy who broke your heart for what seem like the millionth time and the list goes on.

so what pulls us through these times?

well...for me is God. my stronghold and my deliverer. sometimes i wonder what would i be if i didn't have Him in my life. my answer: a resident in Hospital Bahagia, Tanjung Rambutan. lol.

i'm not saying my life is full of sorrows and hurts that i would have to enrol into a mental instituition. haha. all i'm saying is if it weren't for the faith i have in the Lord's unfailing love for me, i wouldn't view things the way i view them today. His grace and mercy has sustained me through all circumstances. and that is why i believe there's no problem too big for God. there's a saying that says " Jesus is bigger than the biggest problem you ever have." how true it is.

let me end with a passage from Psalms 23 that never fails to comfort me:

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,

he leads me beside quiet waters,
3 he restores my soul.

He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,

I will fear no evil, for you are with me;

your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me

in the presence of my enemies.

You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
6 Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life,

and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

boredom can actually kill

gosh....

the lecturer has a serious problem! i'm having a migraine thanks to his super-duper "exciting" class and note that this is the same lecturer that i once said speaks at the speed of 2seconds per word. to make things worse is his "flawless" english and his constant SS (syok sendiri) remarks.

tuesday's class is gonna be such a torture from today on. good luck me.

more than words

this is who and what God is to me:

• my faithful friend (always there to share my sorrows and joy)
• my tower of refuge (the place i run to in troubled times)
• my compass (guides me when i'm lost)
• my teacher (to tell me what's right and wrong)

the list would never end actually.

you gotta move on girl

school officially started yesterday. it was alright except for the fact that the lecturer spoke at the speed of two seconds per word almost put me to sleep :p really hope he improves though, or else a three-hour class would turn into a six-hour class. i can almost see that this sem would be one nerve wrecking semester. up to today, there will be three presentations to do and some role play and i have no clue how many more will come..ah....lol.

my uncle treated us to a lunch hi-tea at the Legend last sunday. it was fun. i love eating. hehe. i also love the fact that we are one family that eats without barrier. if you know what i mean. to us eat means eat. haha. no saying "eh dont eat this, too high cholesterol", "eh dont eat that, too much sugar", "eh you have high blood, dont eat seafood"...i mean you only live once, enjoy it while you can. plus it's not always that we indulge in all these right. so anyway yea...love eating with my family :) hehe.

oh..decided to go for a jog on tuesday with ivory. changed clothes, put on socks, shoes, opened the gate, walked to the park, took a stroll for like two minutes, started to jog a little. it rained. nice. -_-

all in all...its all good :)

Hello 2008 !

yup... and that also means goodbye 2007 :(

so yea...first post of the year. hehe. lets just start with a lil recap of 2007...overall it's been an exiciting year...lots of ups and downs actually and like ivan said, it's been a year with the most things happened.
there were good times like church camp in may (it was by far the best time of the year for me) and of course the year wouldn't be complete without the bad times which i dont think i would like to share. sorry to crush your hopes though. lol :p

anyways...its a new year and that means a fresh start too :) resolutions? hmm...i think i'll pass that. you see the reason why i dont wanna have new year resolutions is very simple: i dont keep up to it! so why bother...just go with the flow la...wherever God leads. haha. oh but there is one thing that i would like to start doin this year (hopefully the zeal stays to at least march :p), that is to exercise more or to be more accurate, to start exercising. haha. i'm not complaining bout being fat or anything but figured it'll be one of the more beneficial ways to fill my time as it finally dawned on me that sleeping isn't really fruitful after all. lol

other than that...i'll be starting my 6th sem that is the second last semester next week...how exicting -_- i'm seriously not looking forward to business law...arrgh..all those penal codes just dont seem to exicite me. oh..but i do look forward to something though...Chinese New Year! lol. i know i know...it's a month away. but having something to look forward to seem to make the days past faster. hehe

oh well...can't wait to see what's God installed for me this year :) till the next post....

tata

my priceless blessings

haha. yes..i know i said i was done with this year's posts.

but just felt like sharing this. hehe. God has truly blessed me with family and friends that always have my back in no matter what i do and what decisions i make and just figured that these people (you know who you are) fully deserve my thank you. i know a word of thank you isn't comparable to the amount of support you guys gave, be it directly or indirectly, but trust me they mean a lot to me. through thick and thin you have been there :) and know that i love each and every one of you.

so, THANK YOU all !! you'll always have special places in my heart :)

ok ok this is really gonna be the final post. hehe. anyhow, once again...Merry Christmas ! best wishes year 2008.

this has to end soon

this week has generally been kinda good. not great but ok. at least better than last week.

there's been a lot going through my mind and i'm starting to feel tired. tired of all the qualms mostly that i wish i had the answers to. i want to move ahead. i really do. but it's really not as easy as it looks you know. things that i dont want to think of somehow just keep flashing in my mind constantly, making it really tiring for me as i try so hard to ignore them.

Lord, i know you're there. Give me rest.
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28

as cliche as it sounds, the year indeed past fast with much to look back. there were good times that would stay as memories and of course there were also bad times that would stay as history. but God has been faithful.

this would be my last post for the year. so here's wishing everyone a Blessed Christmas and Happy New Year !! :)

in the midst of recovery

we planned to go to melaka today for a day trip. was supposed to be an eating trip. hehe. mum didn't want to drive so wake up at six, take a bus down to puduraya to buy bus ticket to melaka was the actual plan. but somehow luck wasn't on our side, ivory locked the car keys in the car when mum and i went down to get something, so we had to take a cab back home to get the spare keys :p and by the time we got back to our car it was already ten.

to cut the long story short, we ended up at sungei wang and times square instead. hehe. it wasn't too bad. the only thing was KL was practically ruled by foreigners especially at central market and petaling street. there was like a sea of them. buses were all packed with them. and man...it was chaotic at sungei wang and times square...left, right, up, down...humans everywhere.

all that aside...i managed to get myself a t-shirt and a pair of pumps! mission accomplised. hehe. wanted to buy anothe pair of shoes but mum wouldn't allow. she was like "you're not even working why do you need so many pairs of shoes?" -_- an interesting but tiring day indeed.

my feet needs rest.

make me smile

aunt and mum decided to take grandparents for buffet. it was aunt's treat :)
it's been a while since i indulged in food. hehe. it was good not to mention the extra pounds gained...like i care anyway. lol. oh and i realised i'm not really a meat person. couldn't even finish a piece of chicken, how pathetic.

and cant wait to go shopping. i want a new pair of shoes! :p but i think i have to go on my own since mum would most probably not fancy the idea of having to tail me shop after shop, cousins going out of town, ivan would rather guard the church and i would rather not torture my friends so solo-shopping it is though mum would disagree. oh well...we'll see. but anyhow i want a new pair of shoes by end of the year :p

oopps almost forgot...gotta write Christmas cards. have to post tomorrow. dont want them to be belated christmas cards. lol

arios XD

the reason for the season

I'll Stand by You - Carrie Underwood

Oh, why you look so sad? Tears are in your eyes
Come on and talk to me now.
Don't be ashamed to cry, let me see you through
Cause I've seen the dark side too.
When the night falls on you, you don't know what to do,
Nothing you confess can make me love you less
I'll stand by you, I'll stand by you,
I won't let nobody hurt you,I'll stand by you.

So, if you're mad get mad, don't hold it all inside,
Come on and talk to me now.And hey, what you got to hide?
I get angry tooWell I'm alot like you.
When you're standing at the crossroads, don't know which path to choose,
Let me come along, cause even if your wrongI'll stand by you,
I'll stand by you, I won't let nobody hurt you,I'll stand by you.

Take me in into your darkest hour, and I'll never desert you.
I'll stand by you.
And when, when the night falls on you baby,
You're feeling all alone,You won't be on your own, I'll stand by you.
I'll stand by you, won't let nobody hurt you.
I'll stand by you
Take me in into your darkest hour and I'll never desert youI'll stand by you.
I'll stand by you. I'll stand by you. I'll stand by you.

Jesus stands by me. Sees me through the good and the bad.

What more can i ask?

the end of this chapter

why do people run from problems instead of trying to work things out? if all our lives we keep running away from problems..how are we then going to succeed in life? at least trying would still give some hope. but refusing to try just tears things down all together. no hope. no solution.

some things happen just make me doubt that people learn from their mistakes in the past. i thought the classic advice is "Learn from your mistakes."? but how come people dont learn instead repeat them and hurt even more people along the way? i thought experiences make us grow and mature? i thought they could help us in handling things better, treat people better, make wise and not selfish decisions and to basically look at life in a more mature perspective? for some people, i guess not. sadly.

saying alone is not enough. words alone bring no meaning unless they're supported with actions. when words contradict with actions, thats when hearts are broken. trusts are betrayed. hopes are crushed. dreams are shattered.

some people just disappoint me to the max. over and over again.

do you love me?

was talking to Ivan on the bus the other day on the topic of love. heh. he was saying something bout to say that you love someone is easy but to actually mean it is a whole different thing.

i could not agree more. we can easily say "i love you" to someone every like five seconds. but do we actually mean it? or do we utter those three words just for the sake of it? there is a fine line between saying and meaning those words that many of us still are not able to see it.

the moment you realise you really mean those words is when you are willing to do anything beyond all measures for that person. even if it means risking or gambling your pride, fame, wealth, belongings, family or even life. i don't think any of us have reached to that extent. but i know one person has and his name is Jesus. He has showed and demonstrated the true meaning of love because He IS love.

i bet nobody would ever be willing to sacrifice his life for someone else for the sake of love. not through a cruel death at least. not if he has to be NAILED, crowned with the crown of thorns, whipped all over the body while walking and heading to his death place and mocked and spat at. not a very good idea isn't it if the reason is love? i don't think it is but He thinks otherwise. in the name of love for His people, this man called Jesus is willing to sacrifice himself on that old rugged cross to redeem them from their sins, so that they may gain salvation that is eternal life.

how great of a Love is that?

my joy

And in this crazy life
And through these crazy times
It's you
It's you
You make me sing
Your every line
Your every word
You're everything

i'm a big girl

i dyed my hair.

yes. i did. dyed the first time, no effect. tried again, second time, still no difference. frustrated did the third time...ah..finally. lol. you see...i'm not a very adventurous person and am afraid to take risk. i know dying hair its a no biggie but i was really scared of how the colour would turn out so the first two times i washed it off within 10 minutes. haha. anyways, i'm happy with the result. hehe =p

i believe everything that happens, happens for a reason. and God for sure is the mastermind behind all that. nothing happens coinciddentally or out of sheer luck or hard work but it all happen according to His will and plan. you may not be thankful for it now but in the future eventually, the whole picture will get to you. and that is when, His name will be glorified.

who am i that You are mindful of me?

all i want to say is that I AM HAPPY. hehe =)

will write more the next time. gotta run now. lol

-smiles-

contented i am

what a week. in a good way though =)

im starting to feel the pinch of stress now. it just feels like there's so much to do in so little time. i'm still in the holiday mode i guess. feeling really sleepy these days particularly today. hehe

God's time is always right. you may not fully understand it at that time but as time passes and things happen, only then the picture is clearer. why is it so hard to put our trust in Him? didn't he promise us that He'll never forsake us many times in the Bible?
(No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you. Joshua 1:5, ..."Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you." Hebrews 13:5)

yet there's so much of lack of faith in us. there's just so much pride and self centeredness. all we need to do is ask, seek and knock (matt 7:7). why are we so afraid? the answer lies with us.